The Dungeon Chronicles
Part 1, Chapter 1:


(Late one evening,... six young fools gather for a "simple" game of AD&D.)

STEVE: Okay guys, ready to play... the game!? Heh-Heh-Heh!
DENNIS: Just start already Steve!!!
STEVE: Easy Den... Okay, you guys are still in the same dungeon, in the same room, and in the same situation, as of the last two weeks, with the door blocked by furniture. What do you do?
PAUL: I go over to the window and smash it with my sword!
STEVE: (Rolls d20 but doesn't look.) Okay Paul, you broke it,... now what?
PAUL: Are there any more windows?... If there are I break them!!
STEVE: Okay... You broke two more, but you also have attracted some "things",... that look sorta like birds, that were outside.
DAN: Nice going Paul, why not just tell every monster in the place where we are!
PAUL: {Sarcastically} Ohhhh Dannnnnn ... Iím really scared of some freakin' birds, ... go sniff your spell components!
STEVE: Well Paul... These "birds" swarm in and start attacking you with pointed beaks a la Alfred Hitchcock.
DERMOT: Oh no... not stirges again!!!
STEVE: Oh yes, stirges again!!!
PAUL: Steve-you-asshole, give us some real monsters!!!
STEVE: Well if they aren't real monsters you've got nothing to worry about, Paulie... but I think you do.
DENNIS: Nice going Paul... you just had to break the windows!!
PAUL: Shut up virgin!!!
DENNIS: Fuck you Paul, okay!!
PAUL: You wish homo, Iíll---
STEVE: {Interrupting} Gentlemen, and Paul,... lets be civilized... Ah-hem!!
Well, while you guys were arguing, the stirges were able to attack first... and, (roll, roll, roll, roll, roll) they all hit!!!
EVERYBODY TO STEVE: *$#%&^&^*&#!!!! STEVE-YOU-ASSHOLE!!!
STEVE: Sorry guys.
PAUL: Yeah I bet!
STEVE: Hee-Hee-Hee!
DAN: Easy guys... Steve, Malchor goes "Oh My!" and casts a Stinking Cloud at them.
STEVE: (roll, roll, roll) Okay... you got all the flying ones, but there are still four more sucking away quite happily on the Barbarian and three more are getting intimately acquainted with the Cavaliers blood supply. So,... what do you do?!

DOOR: -KNOCK-KNOCK-KNOCK

DENNIS: Pizza's here! Dan, get the money.
DAN: Everybody pay up,... you to Paul.
PAUL: I better get my two cokes or I'll be pissed!

To Be Continued...